What happened?

I am separating from a 7 year long relationship. Ego is in control full time, I feel all is my responsibility but it is not. God knows I have tried and looking back maybe I have tried a bit too much. When is it a moment to realize that partner adjusting to another one means they are not living their life? Some people are born to lead, some are born to follow, it is so easy to get lost in roles and responsibilities - given or willingly taken.

I have been through this before, I remember a moment when I just looked myself in the mirror and said: you will not cry for this, nobody will make you cry! I am older and more mature now, I want to cry, I want to let myself go and feel the emotions. I am ready to move on. I want to forget tho, how does one forget? Through forgiveness: I forgive myself for believing that our bond was impeccable, bomb proof and solid beyond measures, I forgive myself for being naive and thinking Scorpio was tamed, I forgive myself for neglecting anything that mattered just a day before and taking risk that makes me look back and think: it was worth it!

We opened relationship on our demand, it didn't work, it never would with me. I am so territorial.

Dogs and me at home, one soul less, soon new tenants will be moving in.

Transition

I bury you with broken promises.
Eagle soaring and Fox running through the fields,
Two dead rats and fireworks for a festival,
Gods on both sides, guarding the door.
Father in a comma, grandfather with a wounded soul
Finding lost traces, tragedy of the war.

That is how we connected,
No expectations at all
Only moment by moment
Following the Natural Law

Name of a Lake, fire in disguise,
You taught me about loving
Passion without boundaries
Standing tall, bathing in beauty.
Like heat in the amethyst cave
Releasing, Relaxing, Reflecting